Sunday, January 20, 2013
Test day...
Test day is coming. I don't know where my positivity went but I'm not feeling hopeful at the moment. A few days ago I dreamed I got a bfp and I was so happy, so sure that was a sign this cycle was the one. We did have great timing with the bd'ing but something feels off.There is a serious lack of symptoms. That coupled with experience is enough for me to feel ridiculous for having any hope.I have never gotten a bfp, why would this be any different? A part of me wants to just give up. I'll never be able to afford IVF or adoption so this really does feel like I'm nearing the end of the road. I know that it's still early and things may change but I just don't see it.Test day is this Thursday and I'm not looking forward to it.This is what infertility has done to me.
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I remember the anxiety feelings prior to test day and the "predisappoingment" of lack of any symptoms of pregnancy. Hang in there. Crossing my fingers for you for Thurs.
ReplyDeleteI know that feeling all to well. Sending you positive thoughts. Don't lose faith ;)
ReplyDeleteThank you both for your words of encouragement. Will keep you posted as to what happens on thursday. Thank you for reading and taking the time to comment. This is a hard journey to go through alone and I'm so thankful for the support I receive.
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