Sunday, January 20, 2013

Test day...

Test day is coming. I don't know where my positivity went but I'm not feeling hopeful at the moment. A few days ago I dreamed I got a bfp and I was so happy, so sure that was a sign this cycle was the one. We did have great timing with the bd'ing but something feels off.There is a serious lack of symptoms. That coupled with experience is enough for me to feel ridiculous for having any hope.I have never gotten a bfp, why would this be any different? A part of me wants to just give up. I'll never be able to afford IVF or adoption so this really does feel like I'm nearing the end of the road. I know that it's still early and things may change but I just don't see it.Test day is this Thursday and I'm not looking forward to it.This is what infertility has done to me.

3 comments:

  1. I remember the anxiety feelings prior to test day and the "predisappoingment" of lack of any symptoms of pregnancy. Hang in there. Crossing my fingers for you for Thurs.

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  2. I know that feeling all to well. Sending you positive thoughts. Don't lose faith ;)

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  3. Thank you both for your words of encouragement. Will keep you posted as to what happens on thursday. Thank you for reading and taking the time to comment. This is a hard journey to go through alone and I'm so thankful for the support I receive.

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